Her lips were soft, her touch firm, she smelled of roses and her juices tasted like liquid velvet. She was a distraction, someone I knew in my heart I didn’t want to see again but fulfilled me for the night. I laid in bed curled up in my sheets into the early morning hours staring at the ceiling. The emptiness I wanted her to fulfill was still there, no matter how hard I tried to escape it, it would still be there.
I didn’t think or feel when we touched. After all, she would be my second female and I wasn’t really used to a road map of the woman’s body just yet. A man, they are easy; a kiss here, a lick there and a deep suck to get them started. But she must have been able to tell I was new at this, I fumbled around. Touching breast and vaginas, I still feel as though maybe this just isn’t fully right.
However, she had a different connotation and lesson for me. Just as I would with a man, she slithered her way down to my nether region. A blow of hot air and a lick of the tongue was all I needed to be sent into blissful heaven. The gap between my legs was hot and moist just from the anticipation of what she would do next.
As she came up for air while my body withered in bliss, I felt like a weight was sinking into my stomach. I knew what I was about to face, I was rebelling, I was determined to conquer myself as I came to a grinding halt. I pulled her up into a firm and tender kiss. Love involved more than this, there was talking, hopes, dreams, and fears; this was not love, this was determination of self-control.